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Saturday, December 13, 2008

You Know You're From Scranton When... know people that pronounce the name of your fair city without the 't' in the middle (Scran-un).

...someone gives you directions that involve going "up da line" and you actually understand what they mean. know older folks who use the phrase "corps house" whenever someone passes away remember chicken croquets being served at Oppenheims Department Store as being a fancy meal (still) see giant mounds of rock and don't think it looks abnormal

..despite what you read in the New York Times, you actually do realize that there has not been a coal mine operating the region in decades see local people on TV who oppose any and every form of progress/development, whether it involves public, private, stolen or borrowed money

...the local Catholic Bishop is trusted less than the Mayor know that Wilkes-Barre is close, but you almost never go there don't even know where "Nanni-coke" is, outside of somewhere near Wilkes-Barre know someone who lives in Wilkes-Barre, but when they describe where they live to someone from outside the area, they actually say "ahhh, near Scranton" take pride in having one of the worlds largest Salvation Army store can play "Six Degrees of Scranton Separation" [Hillary Clinton: father was Hugh Rodham, who was born (and is burried) in Scranton] can't tell the local Republicans from the local Democrats

...everyone knows "Uncle Louie" as being a certain all-powerful, almost mythical businessman who single handedly supports an entire town

...people fight for jobs at the Post Office think that mid-March is a perfectly acceptable time of the year to have a drunk-fest/parade

...the crappiest pizza in the world somehow tastes better at the Italian Festival

... the phone book shows 560 lawyers for every neurosurgeon order a "tray" of pizza remember the episode of All In The Family where Edith scream to Archie "I don't want to go to Disney World, I want to go to Scranton!!"

...parking underneath the mall is a common practice

...take pride in telling out of town visitors "yeah, the whole town has mines under neath it; the whole thing could collapse at any time"

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