Search This Blog

Monday, September 19, 2011

10 Reasons Why I Make a Bad Northeastern Pennsylvanian

In no order and for no particular reason other than my own amusement.

  1. I can't stand cabbage and I don't like pork (there goes about 90% of the ethnic food choices around here).
  2. I would rather drive rusty nails through my eyeballs than attend a political rally and/or campaign event for someone unless I consider them to be a personal friend.
  3. I don't "get it", you know, the whole Notre Dame thing in NEPA.  The school is in Indiana.  The school's name is French.  So they have this stupid little gremlin-esque thing as a mascot...big deal.  Something like 0.000009% of the NEPA population has actually attended the University of Notre Dame.  What's more, based on my experience, a decent percentage of the Notre Dame fans in this region probably couldn't get into the university...or any university for the matter.
  4. I don't follow high school football.  My high school didn't even have a football team.
  5. I don't follow professional football.  If I want to see a bunch of well paid males bash each other I'll hang out at a bar near the courthouse on Friday night.
  6. I use my turn signal.
  7. I pronounce the "t" in Scranton.
  8. I find Ocean City Maryland to be a nice place, but not the nirvana of vacation spots.
  9. I'd rather read a good book than watch just about any sporting event on television.
  10. I don't drink coffee (or "caaafee" as it is pronounced in these here parts).
(credit to Ms Rivers for this one)

Maybe I'm destined to live somewhere else.

No comments: